Ep-55: The Christmas Episode | 20 Topics in 20 Minutes

Welcome back, Demon Babies! It’s officially Christmas time, so your hosts are diving headfirst into all things holiday chaos. Traditions we love, traditions we tolerate, seasonal stress, festive delusion, and the random Christmas moments that somehow define the entire month. And yes… all in 20 topics in 20 minutes.

Expect hot takes, questionable traditions, cozy vibes, holiday drama, and a full breakdown of what Christmas actually looks like behind the curated aesthetic.

If you’re new here, Demon Babie is your weekly comedy podcast where we rapid-fire 20 bite-sized topics in just 20 minutes: pop culture, relationships, life spirals, and whatever else we can cram into a caffeine-fueled countdown.

Listen for:
🎄 Our unhinged Christmas opinions
🎄 Holiday traditions we refuse to give up
🎄 Seasonal stress vs cozy delusion
🎄 Festive chaos and real-life moments
🎄 The fastest, funniest, most chaotic 20 minutes of your week

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Transcript

0:01

Welcome to the Christmas episode of the Demon Babie podcast, where we do 20 topics in 20 minutes. And to be honest, we never achieve either of those things. But we do our best. We always do our best, but I'm sitting here with my co host. He's the naughty to my nice. She jingles my bells. Blonde babie. Hello. Hello. Welcome to the show. Welcome to the demon babie podcast. Christmas episode. So it's new. How are you? I'm good. Good. New phone, new haircut. Wow. And you're not even showing either of the things off on the pod. True. Can't see your hair. Can't see your phone. I can grab the phone. Don't. I'm going to show you a feature you're going to be jealous of. Okay. There's a button right up here. You don't have. Push it straight to camera. I have that. Nevermind. I take everything back. But I liked the new camera feature you were showing me before we started filming. Yes. Your phone does not have that. No, that was very cool. Yes. It's like be real. It was like be real, but just in camera. Yeah. You can take a videos like that too. That's very cool. Pretty cool. Big flex, big iPhone pro 17 max grind. Yeah. That's your biggest upgrade in a long time. You usually are behind. I'm on 14. Shots fired. Wow. The motive. No, you upgraded. Good job. 1470. Looking good. Feeling good. Feeling good. So I ran eight miles today and my legs are slowly feeling horrible. I think as this podcast goes, you will be getting worse and in more pain. Yeah, and I wonder if we'll be able to tell. Or if the viewers at home will be able to tell. I don't know, hopefully I'll be able to hold out, but um, Just in these last 10 minutes, It's really set in a lot. It's been a huge wave of a lot going on. Yeah, I was feeling great, and you just kept saying Yeah, we'll film, yeah, we'll film, and It slowly kept creeping up on me. You could've sat up. With my sore legs. Yep. Alright, first topic. Hi, this is Demon from Hollywood, what's your favorite color? Elf. No, what's your favorite color? Blue. Pink. Pink? What's your favorite Christmas color? Pink. You don't do pink. You've never done a pink Christmas. It's cheesy. Your entire life. No, I don't like it. White. You've never, white is your favorite. Christmas color. Yeah, I like a white Christmas. Sometimes I get into blue, but blue gets a little Jewish looking. You don't like the Jews? I like the juice. Are you sure? It didn't sound like it. Not my Christmas! No, I'm just kidding. They have Hanukkah. It is Hanukkah right now. Happy Hanukkah. Oh, happy Hanukkah. It does feel Hanukkah y. You have to say Hanukkah. No, I don't. That's how they say it. Is it? You tell me. I don't know. I'm not Jewish. I didn't think so. Crazy. So what's your favorite color? My favorite Christmas color? This year I'm into red. I know, I think I'm gonna get red paper. I like it. Yeah. It's the year of red devilish or Ralph Lauren demonic Ralph Lauren Christmas devil Christmas I don't really know Satan or Santa Satan or Santa Satan or Santa. I'm dyslexic hard for me to tell No, that's my thing Hey next topic favorite Santa Favorite Santa of all the Santas. Just because I was editing the last episode where we talked about a bunch of movies I feel like Kurt Russell's Santa might be my favorite. That is down bad horrendous, like Midwest horny wife who hasn't had sex in years. Sorry, who's your favorite Santa? Black Santa. Any black Santa I like. Okay. Black Santa's got swag. Name one. Uh, the Eddie Murphy, well his name is Santa, the Eddie Murphy movie one we just saw. Yeah, that was good. He did a good job playing Santa. He did do a good job. He did. He put his own little thing on it. He nailed it. I respected it. Yeah, it was good. So yeah, Black Santa was my favorite Santa. Alright. Plus, everyone's excited when it's Black Santa. It's a, yeah, it's exciting. It's a curve ball, you know? But we all needed it. We were all waiting. We're all waiting for, when is Chinese Santa gonna come out? Now that, that, that should have dropped this year, honestly, with how, how popular it is to be Chinese. Chinese Santa would have been a huge hit. Yeah. Yeah. They have everything. Not Santa yet. Not Santa. Do you think they do, like, uh, in China? Yeah. They do like photos of Santa? No, I don't know why, but I don't think they do. Mm. We should look that up on TikTok. We should look that up on TikTok. Yeah. Do you sit on Santa's lap in China? Yeah. Or do you think we need to get the old TikTok Chinese version? Oh, red note. Look that up. Do we? Yeah. Do we need to get Red Note? That would be, questions for Red Note would be an entire episode. Next topic. This is our fiance Christmas. Fiance Christmas. What do we do as fiances? What are things you're supposed to do as fiances for Christmas? I don't really know. I feel like a dog, like you just run around and you say your fiances. I think that's kind of it. We already have a dog. We do have dog. We have dog. We have sweat. You wear sweaters, I think. Like matching sweaters? Maybe matching sweaters. You know, they have Christmas sweaters at the grocery store. We could get grocery store sweaters. You know, I'm not gonna wear a matching sweater with you because I don't want to outshine You think you're gonna outshine me? You actually, you are in sparkles right now. I'm sparkling. My makeup's sparkly. Where's yours? No eyeshadow, none in sight. You look shit. Your makeup looks shit, by the way. Um, yeah, I'd love to match sweaters with you. That would be really funny. You'd love to? I don't think you would. We've never done it. We've never done it. You hate matching with me. We've never done it. I always go, we gotta coordinate a little bit. Let's match. And you're like, why do you wanna dress like me? You're the one that's rejecting it right now. Yeah, because I've been tortured with years of not matching. We weren't fiancés. Oh, now that there's a ring on the finger you'll match me? Yeah. I see how it is. There were rules to this game. You weren't playing to win. Until now. Okay. Now you can get your sweater. You've always wanted it. Why don't you just hit me? Next topic. Santa. Let's really break down his whole vibe. Let's break down Santa. The outfit is always great. Yeah. All Santas are dressed well. I've never seen a poorly dressed Santa. Um, I feel Spongebob one where he wasn't looking good, but I think it was just Spongebob dressed as Santa. But like the classic Santa outfit. Classic Santa. It's a good looking outfit. When was that invented? older than us. I'll tell you that. A hundred percent. Like the 18 hundreds, like where did his first suit come from? Because I feel like he's always, has he always been red? He always been red. I feel he's always been in a big suit. Has he always been from the north? Has he always been fat? Has he always been fat? Where? Where did Santa start? Did he always have a sweet tooth? I think yes. You're most confident on that part. Upset. Did he always have a beer? He's always been Nordic. I think that, I think that's part of it. That's true. Isn't he German? I don't know. These are questions for Red Note. Klaus. Santa Klaus. Santa Klaus? Klaus is a Swedish name, so. Yeah, so. I literally have a cousin named Klaus, so. Klausson. Uh, has he always been married? Was there ever a bachelor Santa? What was Bachelor Santa like? Was he wholesome or was he naughty? Is that where the naughty nice list came from? He was the original naughty person on the naughty nice. And did Mrs. Claus put him on the nice list? Or did she put him on the naughty list? These are the questions for Red Note! Let's get back on Red Note. I love Red Note! Uh, but Santa's outfit, and aesthetic, pretty baller. Yeah, I mean, it's a pretty bougie outfit. I like when Santa has nice things. Like that makes me feel like, yeah, cause he's got to have his life together. Cause if he doesn't, I have no chance. If Santa's not wealthy and rich and has nice things, how's he delivering presents all over the world? He's gotta be rich. Like is Santa a billionaire? Santa's gotta be a billionaire. Trillionaire. Is Santa the secret only trillionaire? Yeah. Yeah. Right? Slave money though. Yeah. Like the elves are trapped. They're not allowed out. You'd be an elf. Would I be like an upper elf or like a low, low? No, I'd be like an upper elf. I'm cute. No, you'd be like, uh, you'd make stuffed animals. Oh yeah. All right. Hit me. Actually. Next topic. If we, if I was an elf, if we were elves, what would our jobs be? That's a good topic. I think you'd make stuffed animals. Or hot chocolate. I would make the hot chocolate. You might be the baker elf. I'm the baker elf. Yeah. A little Swedish baker elf. I don't know. I'm just making my bread. Yeah, that's what I do. He doesn't want bread. Okay, I'll make the cookies, but I'm also making bread. For who? Myself. You would just eat cookies. Yeah, I would. Yeah. The elf physique would be great for me. The elf. Yeah. Okay, wait, what's my elf work? What would you make? You'd be a woodworker. Chairs? That's not a gift. Whatever. No, they make toys out of wood. Hello? What kind of toys would I make? A top? Blocks? Blocks would be pretty easy. Trains? I'd be pretty easy. Planes? Automobiles? Maybe. Wow. You could make a rocking horse. That'd be sweet. You could make a lot of stuff out of wood. Yeah, okay. I would be Maybe you wouldn't, not creative. Maybe I would be the wood maker. And you'd be the baker. Why are you stealing my job? Didn't sound like you had any passion. I just wasn't prepared for the role. I lied on my resume. Next topic! Best Christmas meal you've ever had. Ever had? I liked when your parents did crab legs. That was pretty cool. That didn't feel Christmas y to me. When we were growing up, we did meatloaf, which was pretty nice. What? Yeah. You did meatloaf for Christmas? Mm hmm What? Yeah. Really? She changes it every year. Meatloaf. Yeah, that one was good. Meatloaf, mashed potatoes and like. Seems a little lackluster for Christmas. It was a good sized one. Like everyone was over. It's just ground meat. I enjoyed it. Sorry. This is crazy. Okay. I'm fine with it. I'll let it roll. Are you? No, but fine. Okay. Um, I like your grandpa's meatballs. He does every year. Really? Yeah. They're actually, that hits for me. Oh, that's cute. Yeah. I love it. I love going and helping him make them. Oh, wow. It's great. Very cute. That's my favorite Christmas. And then for me, cheesecake, but that's not a meal. That's not a meal. Dessert. Favorite Christmas. Next topic. Favorite Christmas dessert. I'll do the, your family cheesecake with you. It's good. Yeah. It's I like it with lingonberries though. Well, you add toppings. They don't, you know, you're non traditional with it. I get loose. I mean, it's good though. I love a little secret family recipe. I feel like it's very Christmas. You got a little family secret going on. I mean, I got the family secret meatball recipe, so yeah, you have it. I can get it. Well, you don't have it. You don't have it. I could make it. You could guess. I could do it. I know exactly what's in it. Okay. I've never seen you make it. Make it right now. So you would be the baker. You'd be the baker elf. Not the baker. Find the chef. Chef elf. Chef elf. Shelf. Shelf. Oh, bad name. Back to woodworking. Back to shelves. God damn it. Next topic. Uh, speaking of building. Okay. Gingerbread houses. I'm so bad. Terrible. Oh, so hard. You're saying I'm terrible or they are hard to make. They are hard to make, but I kind of want to run it back. Should we do that this weekend? I'd be kind of down. Yeah. Pick one up. Okay. We'll make it. No, from scratch. No, no, we don't have that kind of technology. We do. We are scratch so dumb. No demon babie tries to make gingerbread houses from scratch. What kind of house are you gonna make? I'm gonna make a castle. A castle Christmas. You're really shooting too high. Are you gonna bring it to someone's house? No, our house. Hello. Are we gonna eat it? No. You're just gonna make a castle. Yeah. And throw it out. That's wasteful. I'll eat some of it. Uh, I love gingerbread. Yeah. It's delicious. Underrated. I'm going to say, I'll say that too. Yeah. Along with ginger snaps, gingerbread, ginger, same thing. Feels like it just thinner. Yeah. It's gotta be thicker to make a house. Yeah. Cause gingerbread, ginger snap. It just feels like that. They taste the same. I like ginger. Yeah. Ginger is good. Yeah. I'm going to say more gingerbread in the South. Gingerbread cookies or gingerbread. Is there a difference? Like, is there a bread bread? I don't think there's a bread bread. It's just gingerbread cookies. I think there's just, yeah. It's just a cookie. I think, I mean, I'm sure there's gingerbread in the world, but not really what you're talking. Not like what I'm thinking. It's not like pumpkin bread. No, but it does sound good. Right? Now you're going to be craving pumpkin bread. Listen. I love pumpkin bread. Let's get some pumpkin bread going. You know I would. I, I do. Next topic. Favorite gift you ever got. For Christmas? As a kid? Yeah. Trampoline. That's a good one. But it was a family gift, like all of us. It was a shared gift. I was lit. That one was really cool. What about you? Uh, ATV. Whoa. Yeah. That's a big gift. Huge gift. Biggest gift ever. Yeah. What happened to it? They sold it after a while. Yeah. We moved houses and I didn't have anywhere to ride it. They sold it. Bummer. I know. That's, they could have ridden it in the backyard. I know. I could have ridden it around. Yeah. I'd no say in the sale. You didn't know. I didn't know it was getting sold. It was just gone. Where's my ATV? Where's my ATV? Yeah, that's a cool gift. Yeah, pretty cool. I'm impressed you got that as a gift. I flipped it. A few times. Like, and you landed it? No, no, no, no. Hurt yourself? No, like, few people almost died on that thing for sure. Mmm, probably good you sold it. My friend smashed it into a cement wall. Oh my God. Yeah, he almost died too. Dangerous. Dangerous. Don't, yeah, what? Fun. Wish I still had it. I mean listen, people almost got hurt on the trampoline too. Let's be honest. Hit me. Next topic. Uh, real tree or fake tree? Real tree 100 percent all the way. No, fake tree is way better. Liar. No mess. Liar. No mess. I know this isn't your stance. You're just saying this for a debate. One purchase and then you're done. Forever. Forever. Plastic, no spirit. You should reuse it over and over and over again. Yeah. No. Hate it. The best. Nope. And then you can just, and even then, then you can just wrap it while it's decorated and store it and then just bring it back out. You don't even have to decorate it ever again. No, not, not the point, not the spirit. So you're not liking the fake tree idea? No, never have. Never will. Oh, okay. All right. Next topic. Next topic. Move it on. I hated that. Worst part of Christmas. Fake trees. Fake trees. Yeah. Um, worst part of Christmas. No, there actually has to be a worst part. When you have to get a gift for the entire family and the budget gets stretched so thin that all the presents are so garbage. Yeah. You're embarrassed to give them. Yeah, I agree. No, that feeling actually is just terrible. You're like, I had to spend 10 on everyone's gift because there's 30 people I had to buy for. 45 people. Yeah, that is the worst. I'm glad we stopped doing that in your family. Yeah, it's made the Christmas way less stressful. I like a one person Christmas. Buckshot. Yeah. Do a secret Santa, call it a wrap. Much better. When people are adults. Yeah. Kids all get presents, but like adults, we don't all need something. Exactly. Barely even doing secret Santa anymore. I like it. No, I love it too, but I'm saying it's barely happening. When it's too stretched thin and you're just like, yeah, I can't keep doing this. Yeah. Agreed. Although I did like wrapping a million presents. That was fun. Yeah, you're good at wrapping. It looked good under the tree. The aesthetic at the end. I really liked. Good. One of my favorite things. Oh, yeah. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Look at all my gifts I got. Look at all my gifts. Hit me. Next topic. What's a Christmas gift goal to give and get? To get? Something you'd be like, wow, that's something I've always wanted for Christmas, but that's cool. Maybe like a really fancy piece of jewelry. Mm hmm. Like a lot of diamonds. Yeah, like a tennis bracelet or a tennis necklace Okay, tennis in the word. Tennis, but not tennis the sport. Yeah, tennis jewelry would be like jaw on the floor. Cool. Give. Give? I don't know because it depends on the person. Well, do any just maybe if I could give someone a car. Car is my answer for both hands, both of those. Someone gave me a car. I would freak the fuck out. Yeah. And if I got to give somebody a car, I would freak the fuck out. I fuck. I would be freaking the fuck out too. Yeah. If I got to be like. Here are the keys. Go take it for a joyride. Commercials really make you like, want to give a car. Give a car. Yeah, no, they've, they've really sold that one. The big bow. I mean, it's so, I'm getting the big bow. Yeah, it's almost like when you buy a car, they don't give you the big bow. You're just like, I'm like, where's the bow? You're like, did I even get the gift? Hello? Put the bow on it. Wrap it up. Every car should be sold with a bow. I think that's the least they can do. Honestly, I remember getting my car and they were like, yeah, we're going to clean it up, wrap it up for you, make it nice. And I think I genuinely thought I was getting a bow on it. There was a part of me when I got my car, they might put a bow on it for a picture or something. Right. Right. Come on. Come on guys. You can take the bow back. Let me take the pig. Keep the bow. It's just magnetic. Yeah. But let me take a pig. It's crazy. They don't all offer. It's crazy. 5 add on, very dealership esque. Yes. Next topic. This year, do you think you'll be on the naughty or nice list? Think about your whole year. I am probably the naughty list. Oh, you think so? Yeah. Cola, common. Yeah. Aye, aye, aye. But I feel so good at the end of the, I'm hoping the nice list. Oh, I feel so good. I feel so good. I feel so good. Probably naughty. Really? What do you think? I think you're on the naughty list. Yeah. No, I might've saved in the back half. That's what I just said. No, I might've saved myself. Oh, I didn't save myself. Did you do a huge proposal to your? No, I said yes. Saying yes is not a nice list. You got taken on vacation. Yeah, that was pretty nice. So I think I'm, uh You think you've cleared everything? I think I'm pending. No, I don't think I've cleared everything. Yeah, that's what I thought. You're on the naughty list. I'm on the fence. You're being pulled back down by the guards. Get over here, buddy. I'm being cut up by the barbed wire. You didn't make it over that easily. One grand gesture. One grand gesture doesn't save a year's worth of naughty behavior. And bad behavior. Yeah, sorry. Just a couple of naughty centers over here. Well, hit me with the L. La, la, la, la, la, last topic! As we said, the downfall, here we go. I'm like getting slap happy. Sexy Christmas. Is this allowed or not allowed? Not allowed. I don't think it is either. It's really weird. It never works. No, it just looks weird. It's like when people do like sexy Santas at Halloween, it's like, what are you doing? Yeah, I don't like that either. It doesn't work. Like when they do the mean girls Santa outfit. Mm hmm. Like I kind of get it because you're doing mean girls, but it's also Santa. It's weird. That, that bothers me too. Yeah. I don't really approve of a sexy Christmas. I don't really like sexy Santa lingerie. I'm like, I was saying too. I don't like it. Yeah. It just feels odd. It's weird. Or a sexy gif doesn't even really work. No, I don't want it. Thanks. Um, all right, and that's the show Oh, I know what i'm getting this year What? Made it seem like you were doing sexy Christmas. No, you just said you don't want it. A little rude. No. You don't want a sexy gift from me? We'll talk later. That's the show. Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! Happy Holidays! It's not Happy New Year yet. There'll be another episode before that. All right, we'll see you for the New Year's episode. All right. Bye. Bye.